Erstellt am: 26. 12. 2010 - 16:29 Uhr

Johnny Planet: Rückblick 2010/1

Or, There and Back Again: A Johnny's Journey (Pt.1)

After a year of travelling around the world for FM4, I have accumulated quite a lot of experiences, and learned many things about the cities of the world; for example, which city is most like the Talking Heads song, Cities.

Johnny Bliss, 2010

I have devised an elaborate rating system, involving three super-computers working at once (and quite a few broad generalizations), to tell you the most important things you should know, should you decide to go to some of my top cities of 2010.

We'll do this alphabetically, even though chronologically would probably make more sense.

Berlin

Packed full with funky Cafés and clubs, cheap food, abundant parks, and creative people, Berlin's fantastic scene almost makes me forget about some its less fantastic architecture.

I went to Berlin in August as part of an extended trip, Couchsurfing across Europe, which you can read more about here.

Trike, 2010

Berlin-based Canadian electro band Trike

Talking Heads song: Artists Only

Berlin, in my opinion, is both the best and worst city for aspiring musicians, film makers, writers, etc. On one hand, because you are surrounded by so many of the best and brightest, it can be very difficult to distinguish oneself in the very competitive local scene. On the other hand, because there are so many people doing artsy stuff, the ground is very fertile for joint artistic ventures. While I was there, I joined forces with the Canadian electro-trash band Trike to make this song and video.

Artists Only is the song choice, because, duh, if you throw a rock on the streets of Berlin, you will hit an artist.

Time it takes to become friends with the entire population: Forever.

Despite a relatively low population when compared to other mega-cities such as Istanbul, I still give it forever because so many of the people in Berlin are from somewhere else, and very transitory, and leaving and stuff.

Romance of the Public Transport System: 5/10.

The public transport is very gritty and resembles a film noir set to me more than anything else. Maybe you could nurse a broken heart here. It runs very regularly however, and gets one expediently (and relatively cheaply) from Point A to Point Z, in a very spread-out city.

Relative vs. Absolute Poverty: Relative.

Despite living on very little, and sometimes having to busk on the street so as to be able to afford lunch, the artists I've known in Berlin have not struck me as poor, per se. They just don't have money. Being an impoverished artist in a place like Berlin is a form of wealth.

Johnny Bliss, 2010

Zombie Apocalypse Potential: Low.

Like Vienna, but unlike (for example) Paris, the population density is low enough that you can often find yourself walking alone somewhere central at night, which makes it spooky enough to make some zombies believeable. On the other hand, the large empty streets would give one quite enough space to both see a horde of zombies approaching, and to make the necessary evasive maneuvers.

Cape Town

I went to Cape Town in the middle of their winter to cover the FIFA World Cup and I was a bit bemused by everyone shivering at the 7°C weather. I was also disturbed by the paranoia that nearly everyone seemed to have about simply walking on the streets at night, and even during the day.

Johnny Bliss, 2010

Talking Heads song: Life During Wartime

Cape Town is a lovely city with the absolutely stunning Table Mountain looming on one side and a sparkling blue ocean on the other. People are very friendly, and there is a lot to recommend about the place-- both in safer, greener places, as well as in grittier, impoverished urban neighborhoods.

Life During Wartime captures very well the feeling of paranoia and alienation that seems to pervade every shadow of the collective South African subconscious, both black and white.

Beauty of the Promenade: 8/10

Johnny Bliss, 2010

The sandy, warm beaches are really top-notch, in some places even better than in Vancouver - and I wouldn't say that flippantly. The fact is, where other beaches have logs and rocks and starfish and seaweed, the beaches of Cape Town come with friendly, social, and adorable wild penguins.

On the other hand, these same beaches come with the unspoken rule that you absolutely must watch your back if you are alone, and also your possessions. Not being able to relax fully is a bit of a mood-killer.

Time it takes to become friends with the entire population: N/A

If you try to become friends with the entire population, you will find all too quick that there are people who regard you instantly as their enemy, whether you are black, white, or other. While the legacy of apartheid has left scars, there are nevertheless plenty of nice people who you can become friends with, and the scene is big, but not THAT big.

Romance of the Public Transport System: 0/10

Almost inapplicable; there is hardly any public transport system. Minibus cabs are cheap but unmarked, and way too dodgy to be romantic. Trains are fine but stuffy and filled with people.

In short, there may be romance in Cape Town, but it is not to be found in the nearly non-existent public transportation system.

Relative vs. Absolute Poverty: Absolute.

Johnny Bliss, 2010

To be fair, there are places in Cape Town that feel exactly like anywhere in Europe. Nice restaurants with German beer are easy to find in the metropolitan center, and if you belong to the middle class, the houses and apartments themselves are exactly what one would expect in the western world, albeit fenced much more securely than in Austria.

But then, there are the townships which have no electricity or clean running water, and Temporary Relocation Areas (TRAs) such as Happy Valley and Blikkiesdorp. In Cape Town, the gulf between rich and poor could not be much greater, unfortunately. I wrote a whole article on the subject, which you can find here.

Cologne

A month or so after the FIFA World Cup, I came to Cologne to cover a very different sporting event: the Gay Games. A very easy, relaxed, and clean city, you could definitely let your hair down, walking along the banks of the Rhine with an ice cream cone. Eventually, however, I could not help but feel that I was in one of the most generic Western European cities ever.

Talking Heads song: Cities

I'm checking them out, I'm checking them out
I got it figured out, I got it figured out
Good point, some bad points
But it all works out, I'm a little freaked out
Find a city, find myself a city to live in

Johnny Bliss, 2010

Time it takes to become friends with the entire population:
Six months would be my rough estimate. I was there three days and I was already meeting people who knew each other.

Romance of the Public Transport System: 7/10

During the summer, everything is nice and the trams are clean. If you've met someone you're interested in, a nice long ride from one end of the city to the other is as good a place for courtship as any.

Zombie Apocalypse Potential: Very Low.

Frankly, it's too damn clean. No respectable zombie apocalypse could ever conceive of taking place in such a nice and inoffensive city.

Relative vs. Absolute Poverty: N/A

Reykjavik

Despite having a population of only roughly 200,000 people, Reykjavik is surprisingly cosmopolitan, and nearly everyone you meet seems to be in a really amazing band. They're very fashion conscious as well. Some of the Icelandic people can seem initially very cold and distant, but it's just an act; deep down inside they're warm and cuddly, just like the fjords.

Johnny Bliss, 2010

With all the old lava fields and volcanic-ash beaches, you get the feeling that you have come to the end of the world, somehow.

Talking Heads song: The Great Curve

This one was a very difficult selection, as very little of the Talking Heads really reflect the other-worldly quality of this little island nation on the other side of the pond from everywhere.

However, when I heard the Great Curve again, I realized this must be the one. Naturally the whole album Remain In Light is weird and experimental (like much of contemporary Icelandic music) but lyrically much of the song also could really be about Iceland itself.

Sometimes the world has a load of questions
Seems like the world knows nothing at all
The world is near but it's out of reach
Some people touch it... but they can't hold on

Johnny Bliss, 2010

And then the lyrics get all, Night must fall now, darker, darker, which could (with some imagination) be about the cold, dark Icelandic winter.

Beauty of the Promenade: 7/10

It's difficult; on one hand, the island is surrounded by ocean and the ocean is always beautiful. Secondly, the black sand beaches are quite something to behold, and the air is fresh and clean; and although they have no penguins, Reykjavik and other parts of Iceland can boast the second cutest birds in the world: Puffins. (At least for now.)

However, it is a bit cold, wet, and windy to really be able to enjoy walking by the water for very long.

Johnny Bliss, 2010

Time it takes to become friends with the entire population:
A month and a half is about how long it took me; granted, I was actively out interviewing and meeting people. So let's say a good three months, under normal circumstances.

On my last visit, it got a bit awkward doing street interviews, because (sometimes) nearly every second person already had been interviewed, or we'd met at a house party the night before. I often ended up ditching work all together, and just getting drinks socially.

After a while, all that familiarity must drive locals absolutely bananas, but when you're only there for a week or two, it's quite nice.

Relative vs. Absolute Poverty: Relative.

The first time I came to Reykjavik was late last year, and the local economy was still staggering from the effects of the recession. The Kroner was still so low as compared to the Euro and other nearby currencies. On the other hand, people were not starving on the streets, the violent crime rate remained low, and the social welfare system remained more or less in place.

Although I am sure the situation was unpleasant, compared to how Icelandic people used to live- in mud huts and eating traditional Icelandic cuisine to survive- people were still living as kings and queens.

Best place for the Talking Heads to stage a reunion:

Johnny Bliss, 2010

I would recommend the Blue Lagoon, just an hour away from Reykjavik. It would be so easy: David Byrne would just be wading through the (literally) blue seaweed-tinged water, and marvelling over the white mud, when suddenly he would bump into Tina Weymouth and Chris Frantz, who were just there working on some strange soundscape project with some Icelandic folk singers. They would all giggle together and go off to the sweat lodge, and just for one moment forget the bad blood between them.

Then Jerry Harrison would fly in, piloting a zeppelin, and they would do an operatic rendition of ... I'm out of ideas.

Editor's Note: After hours of intense discussion with several other Talking Heads fans, we've come to the conclusion that the song they would do an operatic rendition of is O Fortuna by Carl Orff.

To Be Continued...

Meanwhile, listen to the entire year in audio here: